Cleansing of the soul

I was raised to be an independent woman who has her own ideas, who takes action, who won't be made to comply with things that are wrong.

I was also raised to be compassionate to others, help those who need it, love animals and be nice.

I've never been good at keeping my mouth shut when someone is being mean.

I have had several "falling outs" with a few people on Facebook in the past year. Surprisingly they were fellow Christians. It starts with them making seemingly innocent comments but their posse jumps on the bandwagon and it turns into hate filled trash being strewn from their thoughts to a public forum that can be potentially harmful to not only those they are talking about but to the growth of the Kingdom.

It just so happens that in these two "rifts" if you will, I said something. You see these people were my friends, my brothers and sisters in Christ. I thought that as their friend I could say something to them just to let them know that their words can hurt more than feelings.

The irony of the situation: I am more worried about how my actions affect those who are spewing hate trash than they are worried about how their actions affect anyone.


I know that I have said things in the past that I didn't think was negative, angry, mean, hurtful, etc. and people have said to me "Hey, did you realize that...." and I didn't! Therefore I was happy that my friends cared enough for me to enlighten me. Don't get me wrong I'm sure there were multiple times that it hurt my feelings for whatever reason but in the end I trust the wisdom of those who care for me.

In both of these situations my "Christian friends" turned on me like they were rabid dogs. They purposefully said mean hurtful things to cause pain. I tried multiple times to let them know I was not attacking them and bring it back to the point but to them all they saw was red.

I care WAY to much what people think of me. These situations really affected me emotionally. I tried not to care but I let it eat at me inside. I would get on facebook and check on their walls, I left friendly comments, asked them questions and they never responded. One of these people unfriended me yet kept my husband as her friend! WTF who does that? So like an normal person I got on his facebook and checked out her wall. I had planned on calling her to see if we could repair what damage was done but when I was on her page I saw yet another hate filled status update. It was at that moment that I realized there is a REASON that we are not friends.

I got off FB and thought a long time about a few people. I finally decided that I was going to unfriend the poison so it could no longer plague me. It took me a long time to decide to do this because I was worried what my actions of unfriending them would cause.
So I did it. I unfriended those who really are not friends at all. My cleansing of Facebook friends ended up being a cleansing of the soul. I felt a freedom after removing them that I can't explain. I'm sure this all sounds silly and trivial to you and really it is, but this is my blog and therefore, My Prerogative! The flesh side of me wants to know how this husband and wife will feel when they discover that I unfriended them but I honestly hope that instead of being hurt that they will see how their actions and words affect others.

That was the point to start with. In the past year God has really broken my heart for those who are lost. With that came and intolerance of those who don't have that same compassion. In a way that makes me just as bad as those hateful Christians. I will try harder to be more patient and loving. I will not start letting people, my people, be judgemental jerks who are out to cause harm because they feel superior on their soap boxes. I hope that I will be more affective in how I address these situations in the future.

New Blog!

How exciting, I have a new blog. I felt like I needed to shed the old blog because I felt so exposed and at the same time I felt so alone on it. So maybe I will stay true to this beauty.

After all isn't a blog like an online diary?