I'm pretty pissed right now.
I decided I am going to get serious about working out. I need a new sports bra. The one I have doesn't really keep everything in its place, things tend to slip if you will.
I was watching the Biggest Loser and all the women are wearing cool sports bras in fun colors. I went online to see if I could purchase one of these and whatta ya know they only sale the friggin t-shirts. WTH am I going to do with a biggest loser t-shirt? I need the friggin bra.
So I google it and get a ton of crap answers. Sites and stores that offer "plus size" and multiple fun colors and fun joke when you click on it the "plus size" is a 1X or if they do 3X or bigger it only comes in black or white and its $50! Meanwhile you can get an awesome neon green sports bra for $6.99 if you are a size 4. Thanks a lot Target! I know you have to use more material but not $43 worth of material.
Then let us add insult to injury shall we. You can click on "Women Clothing" and there are a plethora of options however none of these options include plus sizes. Oh no we must have a separate tab for fat chicks. As if the chubbies didn't feel bad enough there is no way we could include their size in the "normal" clothes, it might rub off. And let us not forget that fat people do not wear cute clothes, no no no they must wear gaudy patterns and large prints.
Who the hell makes these decisions?
Another funny joke? Skinny jeans at the fat girl store. WHAT!? Again I say "Who the hell... Someone needs fired!"
So now I sit here angry. I know I should not have let myself get to the "plus size" size but I friggin did so now what? I am going to work out and lose weight and get healthy. I just won't do it in a cute sports bra.
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Why thank you sir!
So another wow thing that happened this weekend was I met a man named Joe. Joe is a gay hairdresser and he has a partner. They consider each other as husbands because they have been together for 30 years. Joe went to ISSE with us and while we were all getting ready to go to the club I interrupted the hair teasing and make up applications to address something that was concerning me.
Nathan and I have never really went "clubbing" we have been to a club or two in our life times but the bar/club scene was never our thing. I was afraid that we would get to the club and I would HATE it and want to go back to the hotel but be stuck at the club because everyone else was loving it. Joe was so sweet and asked me what I would say if we got to the club and he said "Guys I really think this is lame and want to go back to the hotel" I said I would go back with him. He said and "So would I."
I thanked Joe for being so cool about my anxieties.
Joe then told me that I am a shining example of what Christians should be.
I said "I am?" and he said "Yes"
He then proceeded to tell me that when he first met me that morning and he asked me how I came to California and I told him that we moved to start a church here in Escondido he immediately thought he wasn't going to like me but curiosity got the best of him and he asked me what kind of church. So I briefly told him what our church stands for and how we don't have a denomination because we believe in the Bible and not all the fuss that comes with the title of a denomination, the unnecessary battles over baptism, communion, music, etc. We follow the Bible because it is God's word. Whats a better way to run a church than by using the word of God!? I also told Joe that we want people to:
Come as you are
Hear the word of God
Do the word of God
Tell others how awesome God is
Joe saw that I wasn't condemning him for his lifestyle, I accepted him for who he is. It is not my job to convict Joe about this lifestyle or to try and change him. Its my responsibility to share God and his love with others and that is what I did. I believe that God has a plan for Joe and his partner. What that plan is I don't know but God is going to take care of it. Joe said that if more Christians were like me than maybe he and his partner would go to church. They haven't had very good experiences with attending church and I can understand their feelings. It just makes me think about my second blog post on this blog. We have to be careful of the things we say and do because it can cause so much damage. In our haste to show people Gods love we tend to try and force that love down their throats. "Oh whats that you didn't change right away? Here let me shove it a little deeper"
"It's not our job to lead people to Christ. It's our job to introduce them and let God do the work"-Dave Ikenberry (sp)
Don't get me wrong. I am not tooting my own horn. I am just happy that I was able to show Joe the love of Christ and a seed was planted. Thank you God!
God is good and I pray that he continues to use me in ways that I can't even imagine. I want to touch peoples lives and not even realize the impact it had. Glory to God, Glory to God.
I'm a believer God but I'm still a work in progress. Please keep working on me and changing me for the better. I want to be a living example of you and your holiness.
Nathan and I have never really went "clubbing" we have been to a club or two in our life times but the bar/club scene was never our thing. I was afraid that we would get to the club and I would HATE it and want to go back to the hotel but be stuck at the club because everyone else was loving it. Joe was so sweet and asked me what I would say if we got to the club and he said "Guys I really think this is lame and want to go back to the hotel" I said I would go back with him. He said and "So would I."
I thanked Joe for being so cool about my anxieties.
Joe then told me that I am a shining example of what Christians should be.
I said "I am?" and he said "Yes"
He then proceeded to tell me that when he first met me that morning and he asked me how I came to California and I told him that we moved to start a church here in Escondido he immediately thought he wasn't going to like me but curiosity got the best of him and he asked me what kind of church. So I briefly told him what our church stands for and how we don't have a denomination because we believe in the Bible and not all the fuss that comes with the title of a denomination, the unnecessary battles over baptism, communion, music, etc. We follow the Bible because it is God's word. Whats a better way to run a church than by using the word of God!? I also told Joe that we want people to:
Come as you are
Hear the word of God
Do the word of God
Tell others how awesome God is
Joe saw that I wasn't condemning him for his lifestyle, I accepted him for who he is. It is not my job to convict Joe about this lifestyle or to try and change him. Its my responsibility to share God and his love with others and that is what I did. I believe that God has a plan for Joe and his partner. What that plan is I don't know but God is going to take care of it. Joe said that if more Christians were like me than maybe he and his partner would go to church. They haven't had very good experiences with attending church and I can understand their feelings. It just makes me think about my second blog post on this blog. We have to be careful of the things we say and do because it can cause so much damage. In our haste to show people Gods love we tend to try and force that love down their throats. "Oh whats that you didn't change right away? Here let me shove it a little deeper"
"It's not our job to lead people to Christ. It's our job to introduce them and let God do the work"-Dave Ikenberry (sp)
Don't get me wrong. I am not tooting my own horn. I am just happy that I was able to show Joe the love of Christ and a seed was planted. Thank you God!
God is good and I pray that he continues to use me in ways that I can't even imagine. I want to touch peoples lives and not even realize the impact it had. Glory to God, Glory to God.
I'm a believer God but I'm still a work in progress. Please keep working on me and changing me for the better. I want to be a living example of you and your holiness.
Nick Arrojo-Yosh-ISSE-Vendors-Stylist Friends-Fun
While wandering around taking in the hundreds of vendors doing a "dog and pony" show to get your attention, listening to DJ's spin, watching amazing stylists perform on stage I ended up in front of the ARROJO booth.
Arrojo? you say....
Well let me fill you in. Nick Arrojo is this fantastic super hair stylist that used to do the hair makeovers on What not to Wear. So he's famous and in the beauty industry he is pretty much giant the big cheese if you will. Well he's on stage one minute and the next BAM he's standing right next to us. Needless to say there were some photo ops.
Some of the stylists were star struck, I don't think I get star struck, I'm just kinda like "Cool, this guy is pretty neat"
Flash forward to a few hours later. We were all sitting in the lounge of the hotel just chilling. Bam Nick is standing right behind me and another stylist. She is in awe and can't even turn around to look at him. She wanted his picture so bad but couldn't ask so I did.
Nick being the totally awesome down to earth guy that he is obliged. There were several more photos taken and lots of talk.
The next day we hit his cutting class and he truly inspired. He really is amazing!
After Nick we had a lunch break and then we hit the technical theater again to see Yosh. Yosh is this out of the world hair dresser that is 70 years old and is still teaching and working behind the chair! He is seriously the Mr. Miyagi of hair. He just moves and the hair fabulous. He is a funny short Asian man. To watch him cut is crazy because you have no idea where he is going and then all of a sudden its done and fantastic. If only I could get in his head for a little while.....
And did I mention that he did a whole demonstration using hats on his head to show how careful we have to be with choosing shape for a clients face!? Genius I say Genius!
So I went up with some friends and coworkers and came back we were all friends! I also got to purchase some great makeup brushes at a largely discounted price and I got to go to a club and dance! Life is good my friends! I missed Nate tons and am so glad I am home with him now!
I do believe that the best part of this whole experience is knowing that proceeds from the ISSE went to help stop domestic violence.
Marva would be proud!
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Cleansing of the soul
I was raised to be an independent woman who has her own ideas, who takes action, who won't be made to comply with things that are wrong.
I was also raised to be compassionate to others, help those who need it, love animals and be nice.
I've never been good at keeping my mouth shut when someone is being mean.
I have had several "falling outs" with a few people on Facebook in the past year. Surprisingly they were fellow Christians. It starts with them making seemingly innocent comments but their posse jumps on the bandwagon and it turns into hate filled trash being strewn from their thoughts to a public forum that can be potentially harmful to not only those they are talking about but to the growth of the Kingdom.
It just so happens that in these two "rifts" if you will, I said something. You see these people were my friends, my brothers and sisters in Christ. I thought that as their friend I could say something to them just to let them know that their words can hurt more than feelings.
The irony of the situation: I am more worried about how my actions affect those who are spewing hate trash than they are worried about how their actions affect anyone.
I know that I have said things in the past that I didn't think was negative, angry, mean, hurtful, etc. and people have said to me "Hey, did you realize that...." and I didn't! Therefore I was happy that my friends cared enough for me to enlighten me. Don't get me wrong I'm sure there were multiple times that it hurt my feelings for whatever reason but in the end I trust the wisdom of those who care for me.
In both of these situations my "Christian friends" turned on me like they were rabid dogs. They purposefully said mean hurtful things to cause pain. I tried multiple times to let them know I was not attacking them and bring it back to the point but to them all they saw was red.
I care WAY to much what people think of me. These situations really affected me emotionally. I tried not to care but I let it eat at me inside. I would get on facebook and check on their walls, I left friendly comments, asked them questions and they never responded. One of these people unfriended me yet kept my husband as her friend! WTF who does that? So like an normal person I got on his facebook and checked out her wall. I had planned on calling her to see if we could repair what damage was done but when I was on her page I saw yet another hate filled status update. It was at that moment that I realized there is a REASON that we are not friends.
I got off FB and thought a long time about a few people. I finally decided that I was going to unfriend the poison so it could no longer plague me. It took me a long time to decide to do this because I was worried what my actions of unfriending them would cause.
So I did it. I unfriended those who really are not friends at all. My cleansing of Facebook friends ended up being a cleansing of the soul. I felt a freedom after removing them that I can't explain. I'm sure this all sounds silly and trivial to you and really it is, but this is my blog and therefore, My Prerogative! The flesh side of me wants to know how this husband and wife will feel when they discover that I unfriended them but I honestly hope that instead of being hurt that they will see how their actions and words affect others.
That was the point to start with. In the past year God has really broken my heart for those who are lost. With that came and intolerance of those who don't have that same compassion. In a way that makes me just as bad as those hateful Christians. I will try harder to be more patient and loving. I will not start letting people, my people, be judgemental jerks who are out to cause harm because they feel superior on their soap boxes. I hope that I will be more affective in how I address these situations in the future.
I was also raised to be compassionate to others, help those who need it, love animals and be nice.
I've never been good at keeping my mouth shut when someone is being mean.
I have had several "falling outs" with a few people on Facebook in the past year. Surprisingly they were fellow Christians. It starts with them making seemingly innocent comments but their posse jumps on the bandwagon and it turns into hate filled trash being strewn from their thoughts to a public forum that can be potentially harmful to not only those they are talking about but to the growth of the Kingdom.
It just so happens that in these two "rifts" if you will, I said something. You see these people were my friends, my brothers and sisters in Christ. I thought that as their friend I could say something to them just to let them know that their words can hurt more than feelings.
The irony of the situation: I am more worried about how my actions affect those who are spewing hate trash than they are worried about how their actions affect anyone.
I know that I have said things in the past that I didn't think was negative, angry, mean, hurtful, etc. and people have said to me "Hey, did you realize that...." and I didn't! Therefore I was happy that my friends cared enough for me to enlighten me. Don't get me wrong I'm sure there were multiple times that it hurt my feelings for whatever reason but in the end I trust the wisdom of those who care for me.
In both of these situations my "Christian friends" turned on me like they were rabid dogs. They purposefully said mean hurtful things to cause pain. I tried multiple times to let them know I was not attacking them and bring it back to the point but to them all they saw was red.
I care WAY to much what people think of me. These situations really affected me emotionally. I tried not to care but I let it eat at me inside. I would get on facebook and check on their walls, I left friendly comments, asked them questions and they never responded. One of these people unfriended me yet kept my husband as her friend! WTF who does that? So like an normal person I got on his facebook and checked out her wall. I had planned on calling her to see if we could repair what damage was done but when I was on her page I saw yet another hate filled status update. It was at that moment that I realized there is a REASON that we are not friends.
I got off FB and thought a long time about a few people. I finally decided that I was going to unfriend the poison so it could no longer plague me. It took me a long time to decide to do this because I was worried what my actions of unfriending them would cause.
So I did it. I unfriended those who really are not friends at all. My cleansing of Facebook friends ended up being a cleansing of the soul. I felt a freedom after removing them that I can't explain. I'm sure this all sounds silly and trivial to you and really it is, but this is my blog and therefore, My Prerogative! The flesh side of me wants to know how this husband and wife will feel when they discover that I unfriended them but I honestly hope that instead of being hurt that they will see how their actions and words affect others.
That was the point to start with. In the past year God has really broken my heart for those who are lost. With that came and intolerance of those who don't have that same compassion. In a way that makes me just as bad as those hateful Christians. I will try harder to be more patient and loving. I will not start letting people, my people, be judgemental jerks who are out to cause harm because they feel superior on their soap boxes. I hope that I will be more affective in how I address these situations in the future.
Thursday, January 13, 2011
New Blog!
How exciting, I have a new blog. I felt like I needed to shed the old blog because I felt so exposed and at the same time I felt so alone on it. So maybe I will stay true to this beauty.
After all isn't a blog like an online diary?
After all isn't a blog like an online diary?
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